Reviewing the best and worst of THC and functional beverages

The Silent Sip

Tag: Fruity

  • Coastalo THC Grape Soda

    Coastalo THC Grape Soda

    Grape expectations, mellow vibrations

    Welp, this is grape soda, straight-up. The real sugar and fruit juice make it taste clean and authentic, like the soda machine at the corner store nailed it. The fizz is a bit meh but the flavor is unapologetically purple and delightfully nostalgic.

    At 5mg THC, it’s not exactly an interstellar journey, but it’s just enough to make you tilt your head at the clouds and think, “Have they always looked like that?” It’s a gentle buzz, noticeable but not overwhelming, like a polite tap on the shoulder from a friend saying, “Hey, let’s just chill for a bit.”

    (Here’s a super quick cannabis chemistry lesson: THC is the life of the party, the friend making karaoke seem like a great idea. CBD, on the other hand, is the designated driver, chilling you out while making sure you drink enough water and don’t text your ex. Coastalo skips the CBD, which means this grape soda leans fully into the head high zone – light, floaty, and great for vibing without feeling tethered to your couch.)

    Now we get to the can. Look, I’m rooting for it, but it looks like it got nervous before a first date and started sweating through its shirt. The design isn’t bad—it’s just… poorly executed. Smudged, smeared, and generally giving “oops, deadline was yesterday” energy.

    Verdict

    Coastalo Grape Soda is a solid THC beverage. The head high is clean and light, the flavor is on point, and it’s easy to sip without overthinking things. Sure, the can looks like it’s seen some stuff, but if you’re craving that nostalgic grape soda taste with a little THC-fueled sparkle this is worth tossing in the cooler.

  • Happi Dance THC Seltzer

    Happi Dance THC Seltzer

    When your drink has better moves than you do

    Meet Dance, Happi’s newest addition to their cannabis seltzer line. With 5mgs each THC, CBD and THCV, it’s a well-rounded sip seemingly formulated by someone who actually drinks these things. Add a splash of ginseng for mood-boosting magic (because let’s be real, who doesn’t need that these days?), and you’ve got a functional beverage that’s practically doing sun salutations in your cup. 🧘‍♀️✨

    (As an aside: I’ve been on the hunt for more drinks with THCV so I was super excited to see it featured here. THCV is a cannabinoid with a milder psychotropic effect than THC and when combined with THC and CBD, it creates what the experts call an Entourage Effect that blends focus, relaxation, and just enough psychoactivity to keep things interesting without tipping into couch-lock territory.)

    Flavor-wise, the mango and sweet basil in Dance swing together like partners who’ve been practicing for years. It’s fresh without feeling sugary and herby without tasting like you accidentally licked a houseplant. And the effects? It’s a subtly balanced boost, mellow without being sleepy, social without being overstimulated. This isn’t a beverage for a solo space-out session where you question all your life choices, it’s for connection and fun. Think lakeside lounging, backyard BBQs, or a chill gathering where you need to keep your wit sharp and your vibe loose.

    The packaging is bright and the line-drawn headphones on the label add a playful touch. Overall it fits nicely into Happi’s existing line of THC drinks, most of which are also awesome.

    Verdict

    Happi Dance isn’t trying to be the loudest drink at the party…it’s the one in the corner making everyone feel at ease while dropping little nuggets of wit and wisdom. It tastes yummy, looks cool, and delivers a light-but-purposeful buzz. It won’t have you dancing on tables, but it will have you swaying along happily.